Why the chicken crossed the road (2)

Put words into their mouths, let them reason out why the chicken crossed the road, let them spill the beans in the hallowed halls of congress, defy (he! he!) the celebrated E.O. 464 and say goodbye to one initialed GMA—all for truth which also means for God, country and people.  Let this array of personalities burst forth with their brilliance that generations inherit, even as there are those who make fools of themselves by their senseless utterances.

A friend said I’m taking time out from politics with this “child’s game” of asking  why the chicken crossed the road. Hey, like the previous column, this one is no respite from politics.  Along with the upright ones, execrable personalities are featured here, and I’m just holding on to the healing power of humor before taking a potshot at trespassers of human rights.  Okay, this is Game II before Congress beats me to the draw with its Impeachment Hearing Part II.  Game na:

Brig. Gen. Francisco Gudani:  Did I hear chain of command?  The chicken knows telling the truth is the paramount law.  It has to cross the road and uphold the PMA honor code not to lie, cheat, and steal.

Lt. Col. Alexander Balutan:  -Ditto-

Sec. Raul Gonzalez:  To craft E.O. 464 for the President’s imprimatur and oversee its strict implementation.

Sec. Ignacio Bunye:  No permit, no crossing of the road.

Rep. Ronaldo Zamora:  The only way of freeing itself from the fetters of a creeping Martial Rule is to cross the road.

Pres. GMA:  Announcing “I’m sorry” across the road is an admission of guilt.

Mike Arroyo:  To get away from the jueteng scandal.

Election Commissioner Garcillano:  It got scared by its own voice on the tape.

Rep. Gilbert Remulla:  To catch the plane for Brazil and Argentina, countries that do not require a visa.

Former Pres. Cory Aquino:  It is not anti-GMA but it joined the pro-truth rally across the road.

Sen. Miriam Defensor:  There are thick GMA-assassination rumors across, even all around, the road.

Sen. Pres. Franklin Drilon:  To dispute the GMA-assassination plot whenever and wherever, be it on its side or across the road.

Sen. Joker Arroyo:  No joking about it; it crossed the road to demand accountability for the Venable fiasco.

National Security Adviser Norberto Gonzales:  Way to go to the Heart Center.

PNP Chief Arturo Lumibao:  Because of the heightened nationwide alert.

Ombudsman Simeon Marcelo:  Health reasons dictate that it must cross the road.  Caseloads of corruptions is detrimental to its health.

Former UP Pres. Jose Abueva:  There’s a cha-cha dance session across the road.

Reader Jane Crucero sent in Imelda Marcos’ reason:  To view the jewelry collection displayed on the other side of the road.  And here’s the latest from the local front:

Mayor Jerry Trenas:  Not one but hundreds of chickens crossed the road.  All of them are our constituents and deserving of relief goods.

City Councilor Perla Zulueta:  Why must it cross the road?  There was no state of calamity.

Now, you English majors out there, wander in the realm of literature and pick your choice of quotable quotes from the works of the world’s literary Who’s Who in addition to what I have chosen for them:

Alexander Pope:  Because to err is human; to forgive, divine.  That goes with crossing all roads.

T.S. Eliot:  Because it will never cease from explorations.  What better reason than that?

William Butler Yeats:  Because the center can not hold.

John Keats:  Across the road is a thing of beauty and a thing of beauty is a joy forever.

F.Scott Fitzegerald:  Neither your piety nor wit shall lure it to cross the road.

Percy Bysshe Shelley:  Because winter is coming and spring is not far behind.

Alfred Lord Tennyson:  To drink life to the lees.

William Blake:  Because He who made the tiger and the lamb also made the chicken.

William Wordsworth:  Because nothing can break back the hour of splendor in the grass and glory in the flower.

Jane Austen:  To sustain sense and sensibility, and banish pride and prejudice.

George Orwell:  The chicken knew Big Brother was performing across the road.

Walt Whitman:  To give me the splendid, silent sun, then to bring me the sunset in a cup.

William Shakespeare:  Crossing the road is a consummation devoutly to be wished.

Well, I don’t say amen to all that.  Whether or not the chicken has chickened out, dilly-dallied or crossed the street with bravado, I only ask if that action was in consonance with the truth and nothing but.  (Comments to lagoc@hargray.com)